Top 5 tips for driving in winter

The winter is here (at least for those of us in the northern hemisphere) and with it brings a whole new set of challenges. Icy and snowy conditions make driving a much more dangerous pursuit - so here are my top 5 tips for staying safe;

5. Slow Down
Seems obvious but many people drive far too fast in the winter. Speed limits are theoretical top speeds you can legally do in good conditions and are therefore not necessarily accurate during winter! This is especially important for those of us in older vehicles without ABS and traction control but even those can produce over confidence in your cars abilities. Just remember, you cannot always see ice - so, if it's cold, it's best to assume it's there and drive accordingly.

4. Allow Time
Everyone is always in a rush these days but allowing extra time is vital in winter. This will give you enough time to defrost your car and heat it up before driving. If you don't allow time for this you will end up rushing on your journey - and therefore ignoring tip 5!

3. Defrosting Techniques
Scrapers good - water bad. That's the general rule - although it is tempting to pour hot water on your windows this will most likely result in them cracking as the two temperatures meet and take their disagreements out on your lovely expensive glass! So either a store bought scraper or, in emergencies, a credit card (be careful not to break it!) should be used - it takes time but it's a lot cheaper. Alternatively a can of de-icing fluid is awesome.

2. Skid Control
This is something I find hard to explain but is a useful skill in icy conditions. If you find yourself sliding across a road it can be a very traumatic experience - the first instinct of an untrained driver (like myself) is to turn the wheel in the opposite direction and slam on the brakes... it didn't work out too well. So, fight your instincts and try to steer into the skid, and pump the breaks (unless you're one of the luck ABS brigade) as you will not stop if the tyres are not rotating.

1. Drive Safe
Many of us pay little attention to driving to the conditions but, as well as tip 5 you should also remember that in icy conditions you should use lower gears to increase control. Also, when cornering, many people will brakes as they turn. It's always best to brake before a corner and accelerate through it but it's especially important in icy conditions where it's imperative to have power going through the wheels when cornering.
Remember: Braking is the most dangerous thing to do in the conditions so slow down!

Top 5 tips for Wittypedia

Bit of a selfish one this - and I'm only really doing it so as to highlight a website I personally support. Namely; Wittypedia.
An underground sensation, WittyPedia was originally an encyclopaedia containing funny articles on a whole range of subjects but it has since evolved into an entertainment mega site. Now rebranded as the Witt, here are my top 5 tips for getting the most out of using it;

5. Browse
Simply go to www.wittypedia.com and browse - you will discover many funny things and check out the original WittyPedia section to see some of the funniest articles ever written by humans.

4. WittyMedia
Click on the title and be transported to a world of funny videos, humorous articles and hilarious photos from around the internet.

3. WittyPeople
Click on the title to see a list of our favourite funny comedians (slight UK bias) along with quotes and a video from each of them.

2. Murraying
Do you Murray? Click on the link - it's funny. No explanation necessary.

1. Contribute
You can easily contribute to the site. Funny pictures as well as video and article URLs can be submitted here and, if you have an idea for a funny article for WittyPedia you can log in or create an account (for free) and type away.

Top 5 bicycle maintenance tips

Nearly all bicycle related issues can be fixed by the owner with a little bit of patience and guidance.
I've been biking a lot lately so this list is based on my personal experience about the most common problems and best solutions. My bike is old and possibly outdated but hopefully most of these tips are universal... they're all fairly obvious probably but I hope someone finds these of use.

5. Repair Kit
4. wrench
3. Right stuff for the right job
2. Brush up (and down)
1. Spares

5. Repair Kit
Repair kits are cheap, small and invaluable - there's no reason not to ride with one. On the road your biggest problems are likely to be a puncture, loose nut or potentially, loss of brakes (due to pad moving) and whilst you should check your bike regularly it is always best to have the correct tools ready for these eventualities.

4. Pliers
An odd one but absolutely crucial for me with my old bike. Some of the nuts are odd sizes and rather than carry a multitude of spanners I instead have a couple of adjustable wrenches or pliers with me when riding. Any problems with my derailleurs or wheel nuts loosening are easily remedied.

3. Right stuff for the right job
Many people, myself included, use household oils such as WD-40 to oil their chains etc. It contains solvents and is not actually designed for this purpose - although it's very good for rusty locks and stubborn nuts and bolts etc. A trip to your local bike shop will give you a plethora of options for different parts of your bike and if you do nothing else you should buy a specialist lube for your chain.

2. Brush Up (and down)
After a muddy ride it is best to clean your bike as soon as possible. If you can put it away in a dry place then hosing down may suffice - although I find a quick scrub with an old brush (off the end of a hose in my case) shifts the stubborn dirt. Take special care around your derailleurs and gears to get all the gunk and bits out - and remember to regrease it all after.

1. Spares
It's always good to have reserves but really all I'm talking about is inner-tubes, nuts and washers cable end pieces - and possibly a gear cable and chain. If you get a puncture you may want to replace your inner-tube - giving you time to find the puncture on the old one and repair it making an instant spare. On a personal note - my girlfriends seat became lose and it transpired that somehow all of the nuts had been lost somewhere along the track... if I'd had spare nuts this wouldn't have been a problem... live and learn.

Recommended Reading:

Top 5 tips for wild camping

Wild camping is the art of camping without a campsite - and not a bed tv show of campers on spring break. 

That means no toilets, no power and probably no other person for miles around.

Wild camping is hard work but a very rewarding thing to do. It's get back to nature reality and the best way to find a little peace in an all too hectic world. 

It isn't without risk though so be careful, be a boyscout, be prepared.

5. Research

4. Equipment

3. Food and Water

2. Location

1. Direction

5. Research

So, you want to wild camp, but where can you do it? The easiest way to find out is to visit one of the many useful websites out there - a quick Google search will enable you to find one for your location. 

 Make sure you find out about the laws relating to wild camping for your area and abide by them. 

4. Equipment

You will need a tent (or bivvy if you're hardcore!) a good backpack (preferably with rain cover), sturdy water-proof boots, possibly with gaiters to stop your trousers getting wet, a change of clothes, trowel or small shovel, pocket knife, 2m of string and a torch. 

3. Food and Water

Ample food is important and the meal in a bag variety that you get from camping shops is perfect for the job (which is probably why camping shops sell them!).

 Energy bars or beef jerky style products are ideal for snacking on during the long days of hiking so take plenty - and don't eat them all at once! 

 Water is most important. Don't rely on there being water where you go even if you know the area as things sometimes change. Take more than you think you'll need and make sure any companions do the same - thinking you have enough and then having to share with others is demoralising.

4. Location

It's wise , for your first few trips at least, to chose a path someone has trodden before. Find information for a route from the internet and if possible pick a 2 or 3 day maximum route. Make sure you have the relevant maps with contour detailing and go over your route carefully. 

1. Direction

Take a GPS, some may feel it's cheating but it really isn't and is a godsend in an emergency. Make sure you take spare batteries. Take a compass too, and know how to use it. It's no use knowing where north is if you can't work out where you are.

Top 5 tips for camping

Just a quick list of things I find useful when camping on campsites. I'll post some tips on extreme camping soon. But for now, here they are;

5. Entertainment

4. Tent

3. Illumination

2. Food

1. Essentials

5. Entertainment

Make sure you have plenty with you because there will doubtless be a few days where you're stuck on a campsite with nothing to do. Books are great, as are puzzle books. You can't go wrong with a deck of cards either both for games and also for building card houses (not good as alternatives to tents). 

4. Tent

Don't be fooled by the makers claims; a two man tent is not a two man tent - unless you happen to be on very good terms with the other man... so much so that you don't mind his elbow in your face all night.

So, unless you are hardcore camping then two people should be looking at four man tents at minimum, and so on. This will allow enough room for everyone and your things too. A preferred technique when camping with a smelly person or unwanted midnight spooner is to place your belongings down the centre of the tent.

3. Illumination

An LED lamp is a must. Most will last for well over 24 hours of continuous use, so you shouldn't have to worry about it crapping out on you. It also advisable to take a torch or two for night time trips to the bathroom and reading without annoying your friends too much.

2. Food

Fry ups and barbeques are the main stay of the camping world so don't forget an ice box to keep meat in. For a quick breakfast I recommend ready made pancake mix to keep you going until lunch. 

1. String

Always carry 2 metres of string or rope when camping in the bush. It has a multitude of uses and  it is always reassuring to have with you. 

Top 5 uses for old plastic bottles

"You're drinking far too many fizzy drinks - you really should cut down!" they say.

 But, "ah," you say, "I use the bottles for other things."

"Like what," says they.

" Like these 5 things." says you.

 And that is how you win that discussion.

5. Vase

4. Ice block

3. Funnel

2. Skittles

1. Money box

5. Vase

An oldie but a goodie. Simply pop the flower through the neck of the bottle and you have an instant vase - and if there's more than one flower you just cut the neck off at a point where it's wide enough. Just add water.

4. Ice block

This was covered in my (ways to cool off) tip section but it is a genuine use so I am re-stating it here. Fill the empty bottle with drinking water - not too full because water expands as it freezes - and then stick it in the freezer. There you have a free ice block - and unlike those little blue ones you can buy, you can actually drink the lovely cold water once it defrosts. Double whammy!

3. Funnel

I generally associate this tip with cars as that's how I use it - so that's how I'll describe it's use. If you find yourself in need of topping up your oil it can be a messy old business. Just cut the top off an old bottle and invert it and hey-presto! You've just made yourself a very useful funnel.

2. Skittles

Take 10 empty bottles, put dirt or something similar in them to way them down - be careful if you have kids who're likely to try and drink from them though - and paint in lovely colours. Then throw a ball at them. But remember, the heavier the ball, the better it is to do this outside.

1.Money box

A useful device for collecting small change or as a means of collecting specific change necessary for pool tables or other such entertainments. 

It obviously helps if the opening is big enough for coins but otherwise cutting a slot in the top helps. If you need easy access to the coins then cutting the whole top off may be the only option.

But most people want to save coins without spending, so a slot may suffice - and painting your bottle with lovely designs, such as a diorama of the life of a yak, helps mask how much is in there and avoid the temptation to raid it.

Top 5 ways of beating the financial crisis - humorous?!?

Thought I better add the 'humorous' tag just in case any desperate share dealers are looking for salvation and turn to here - which is usually filled with slightly more useful tips than these (I said slightly!). I originally wrote these as an article for the ever so funny website, Wittypedia and thought I'd include them here for your viewing pleasure. You can read the full article, and many other funny articles, by clicking here.


5. Tip for the unemployed
4. Tip for office workers
3. Tip for keeping happy
2. Tip for begging
1. Tip for philanthropists

5. Tip for the unemployed
If you are unemployed... remain unemployed. Otherwise you risk the very real possibility of losing your job in the near future.

4.Tip for office workers
If you have an office job make sure that you reorganise all the files in an order only you know, thus making you indispensible.

3. Tip for keeping happy
Charge your mp3 player while you can still afford electricity and then listen to Bobby McFerrin's 'don't worry, be happy' over and over again - this should keep you upbeat - at least until the battery goes dead.

2.Tip for begging
Write to your neighbourhood billionaire (everyone's got one) and ask him for just 0.01% of his fortune in return for you dressing like a 19th century chimney sweep for his entertainment.

1. Tip for philanthropists
Donate your savings to the good people at COJ before you have none left! This will make you feel better about yourself, will definitely make me feel better about myself (as I'll be able to get that 58" plasma TV I want) and may in fact be the act that secures you your rightful place in whatever COJ's idea of an afterlife may be.

Top 5 ways to avoid work - whilst at work

'Please blog on the top 5 ways to avoid work whilst at work, thanks.' - Tao

At the request of one of my many loyal followers (hi you two!),I now present to you my suggestions for avoiding doing work whilst at work. As always, I invite your comments and ideas, and will add any great ones to the bottom of this blog. 

Warning: Some of these tips are pretty advanced - and all come with the down side of possibly being fired, so use with caution;

5. The concentrated stare

4. Tea break/smoke break

3. Complementary laziness

2. The retrace

1. The power talk

5. The concentrated stare

A method whereby you stare at what you are supposed to be doing with such intensity that it appears you are doing it or at least considering all your options so thoughtfully that it would be rude to disturb you. Can be combined with slow arm movements to give the impression of actual work being done.

4. Tea break/smoke break

A hard one to pull off but if you are skilled you can drag a 5-10 minute break out for at least 30 minutes. The trick to this is to look like you've only just arrived in the kitchen/smoking area each time someone new comes in. So, always try to look like you're waiting for the kettle to boil or about to light your cigarette.

3. Complementary laziness

The art of getting others to do your work by lavishing them with compliments. Another tricky one to get right but sometimes mentioning to a colleague how much the boss liked the way they did a certain task is enough motivation to get them to do it.

2. The retrace

Being faster at tasks than your boss expects is always a good idea but can also be an easy way to be lazy. To truly harness this as a means to avoiding work you must first work hard in a concentrated manner to complete your work as fast as possible. You can then spend the remainder of the day relaxing, and simply retracing what you did so that if anyone looks in you can give the appearance of being hard at work. 

Warning: The retrace only works for certain job situations and may actually make you feel like you are working all the time anyway - so use sparingly.

1. The power  talk

The single most useful tip for avoiding work in any work situation is to engage your boss in conversation. This can be done whenever they pass by your work station or at any meetings you have with them. Finding out what they are interested in or what they have done and then asking questions about it is a sure fire way to a nice relaxing half hour or so. 

Most bosses are egocentric and will happily talk about themselves for a long time - and are obviously less likely to complain about your lack of working if they are intimately involved in distracting you.

Top 5 tips - Shopping for bargains - Electronics

These tips are for buying new electronics cheaply, although many of them could apply to any shopping. 

Please feel free to leave your own suggestions in the comments section. If there are any great ones I will add them to the bottom of the blog; 

5. Keep notes

4. Online Research

3. Shop online, research offline

2. Compare online

1. In with the old, forget the new

5. Keep notes

 Primarily, a list of what you want from the product. With the amount of differing opinions you will subject yourself to on the internet it is easy to become confused. Always refer to your list and if it ticks all the boxes then you know it is the right one for you. Bottom line, if it does what you want it to do it doesn't matter what others think.

When online it is worth keeping notepad open and cutting and pasting as you find interesting information online. It is also worth keeping a list of the price on each website. This saves having  to spend a long time retracing your steps trying to re-find a website that had a good deal.

4. Online research

Preliminary research should start with looking up your chosen product on review sites. These can be found by typing the product name and the word 'review' into any popular search engine. As well as providing feedback, they will also often suggest alternative products in a similar price range.

Forums are also a great place to get feedback on a product, including reliability and real world use. Users are usually not shy to voice their opinions and you can often find information about similar, better products from them too, although if it is a forum for a specific brand you may find brand loyalty clouding their opinions...  so beware.  

3. Shop online, research offline

 Although I strongly advocate supporting your local businesses, it is a fact that shopping online can save you a great deal of money. Remember to take into account the cost of shipping though, which may make it cheaper to buy from a shop depending on the size and weight of the item.

 One of the worst aspects of the internet for shopping is you cannot really tell what a product is like, even with great pictures. If possible you should go to your local electronic retailer and check out the product for real. Touch it and play with the features to make sure it is what you want.

 Take the time to compare it to similar products. In most cases the cheaper brands will have similar products and often with more features - quality sometimes, but not always, being the trade off. 

Be sure not to get suckered into believing the hype of better brands. For example, there are probably only one or two companies who supply LCD screens to the majority of TV manufacturers, so it may be possible to pay a lot less for exactly the same screen quality.

2. Compare Online 

Using a comparison search providers such as kelkoo, you can quickly discover the price point of your chosen product from a range of suppliers. Again, it is also worth taking the time to read the forums relating to your product as often there will be retailer recommendations by other buyers (if the forum rules allow) and it is possible you will find out about the smaller, specialist retailers who don't have well established websites but may have greater bargains or better package deals (e.g. cameras with cases and memory cards thrown in, or TV's with home theatre bundles etc.).  However, sadly, smaller companies are more likely to go under, so if store given warranties are important to you then bigger companies are a safer bet. 

1. In with the old, forget the new

The internet makes it a lot easier to find information on product releases. Is your chosen product the latest one? Is it about to get replaced? Was the previous model that much worse?

Decide what features you want and try not to get swayed by the bells and whistles on the latest models. Bargains can be had if you are prepared to wait for new product releases. As the date gets closer keep an eye on your chosen product as it will likely have it's priced drastically reduced in preparation for the new release. 

Top 5 tips for choosing pizza toppings

Just a quick one today and in keeping with my ethos of listing my top 5 tips for everything I introduce to you my list of favourite pizza toppings. This may not fit within the remits of being helpful or humorous but it is at least true;

 

5. Meat

4. Mushrooms

3. Capsicum

2. More meat

1. Pepperoni

 

 

5. Meat

I am an omnivore with a slight emphasis  towards the meaty end of the spectrum now that's a rainbow I'd like to see!). All pizza meats are good but I am gonna highlight ham as my number 4 selection.

 

4. Mushrooms

Amidst rumours that they sit in your stomach for years fermenting, I still can't get enough of them and am craving a bacon and mushroom sandwich as I type this. They are also good on pizzas - so very good.

 

3. Capsicum

Or bell peppers, whatever you wish to call them, they have a lovely burst of flavour that adds a little something to any pizza.

 

2. More meat

I'm sorry, I had to add it again. I love meat. Honestly, I don't care for how it gets to my plate, I have real moral issues with myself, but I can block that out for the benefit of my salivating mouth. I shall nominate  beef here which appears on several of the best pizzas you can get.

 

1. Pepperoni

The king of pizza meats. Ok, it's meat again but there's no other topping I can think of that I would be satisfied with if it was the sole topping on my pizza. Can you think of anything? I mean, every other topping needs something else, making this the king of toppings in my humble opinion.

 

Self help – tips for achieving a goal

Top 5 tips for achieving a goal

This tips section is about how to achieve a particular goal. I try to explain the techniques I use and I hope you find them useful too, but I would welcome any input;

• 5. Write down everything
• 4. Condense and clear out
• 3. Expand
• 2. Split and research
• 1. Don't jump ahead

 

5.Write down everything

Brainstorm it. Write down anything that comes to mind. Use as much paper or screen space as you need. List everything you want to achieve and any thoughts associated with it - like 'taxidermy - will need to learn how to stuff animals, do i need a license, are there schools for it' etc.

4. Condense and clear out.

Once you're happy that you've got comprehensive notes on your ambitions then you can move on to this stage. If you use a computer you may find it easier to print your notes out before continuing because next you will go through what you've written and try to extract the main points and put them in a logical order of what has to be done first. This is best done on fresh paper and the goal is to have a very clear ordered list at the end.

3. Expand

Now you have a provisional list you can expand on the points. With almost all goals you will find that there are steps to take in between now and achieving it. Identify the mini goals on your list - like going to college or meeting new people - and take a new piece of paper and write out the steps to achieving that goal.

E.g. College may be your primary goal or it could just be a stepping stone to what you want to achieve so write out a separate list of things you need to do for that - like how to get in, finding the right place, getting loans etc. - try to think of everything you need to do for that first step.

2. Split and research

Next you may want to split these lists even further. Sticking with the college example you may find it best to have each list item on a separate sheet. That way, you're ticking off one thing and moving to a new page with only one more thing to do. If you have a massive list of everything you need to do then it looks impossible, if your page says 'find out how to get in to college' then that's a lot easier to achieve.

1. Don't jump ahead

Well, it's hard not too sometimes. In the example I'm using you might think to research student loans whilst your researching colleges but if you want an uncluttered mind, it's a good idea to finish doing one thing before moving to the next. Remember to take notes of the information you find and distil them to an answer or short list of possibilities . Try to stay uncluttered.

Top 5 tips for a rainy day

We've all spent an afternoon stuck inside, as the rain poured down - hoping for a brief reprieve so that we could go out and do... outside stuff... the kind of stuff you never want to do until it's raining and you can't do it. Well here are my top 5 suggestions for something to do;

 

5. Jigsaw

4. Rain drop races

3. Hot chocolate

2. Drain Generator

1. Old tin Karaoke

5. Jigsaw

Jigsaws are under-rated. If you're an adult with no kids you might not even own one. You can cheaply rectify this by taking a picture and chopping into lots of small asymmetric pieces and then rearranging them on a flat surface. Use sticky tape if you wish to make the repair permanent. A good motivational tool is to cut up a favourite picture although this may make you unpopular - especially if it's someone else's favourite picture.

 

 

4. Rain drop races

Droplets are forming on the windows and pretty soon they'll be heading south. Pick two and choose which one will move first. Hours of entertainment can be had. But don't get too attached, or give them names, because they'll be gone as soon as the sun comes up and this may lead to depression.

 

 

3. Hot chocolate

Grab the biggest mug you can find and fill it with delicious and sweet hot chocolate. Then go stand and look wistfully out of the window, clutching the mug to your chest and staring into the middle distance. I have never tried this but they do it in films all the time so it must be good. Combine with tip 4 for even more fun!

 

 

2. Drain generator

This one takes some careful planning and preparation but might just be worth it. Simply rearrange the drainpipe  on your house so that instead of simply running down a pipe into the ground it forces the water over a small wheel or turbine assembly.  Depending on how much it rains where you live you could power something very weak for a short or slightly less short period of time and lessen the burden on fossil fuels.

 

1. Old tin karaoke

An advanced tip this ...and you'll need props - so maybe prepare in advance. You'll need at least one old biscuit tin, even better if there's more and different shapes. Then simply toss them outside and listen to the rhythm of the raindrops on the metal. Close your eyes and try to think of a song that goes to the rhythm and then sing it. But open your eyes when you do because singing with them shut makes it look like you're too into the song.

Photography tips for beginners - top 5

These tips for better photos are designed to give the amateur photographer a few pointers in the right direction. These are things I've found out myself by just playing around so if you have any you'd like to add, leave a comment and I'll add them to the users tips at the bottom.

 

5. Composition

4. Angle

3. Subject

2. Timing

1. Quantity

 

5. Composition

Probably the most important factor in making a good photo great is the composition.

For some reason the human eye likes thirds, as an example, a shot of the ocean where  the horizon divides the photo into two just looks wrong. But that same shot with the horizon line one third of the way up will make the shot work a lot better.

 

4. Angle

It is not always necessary to bisect the photo so precisely though, and some more interesting shots can be achieved just by playing with angles. Tilting can create an unsettling feeling or shooting up or down at a subject can drastically alter the mood of the shot. As always, experimenting is the best way to discover which things you like and which you don't.

 

3. Subject

If you're subject is human it is often better to try to capture off-guard moments;  that smile after a shot where the subject had their eyes closed or two friends talking, unaware of the camera. Looking at pictures and remembering emotions can be a far better way to remember a time than the blank smile of a posed shot.

 

2. Timing

We can't always wait for magic hour but, if possible, try to avoid midday as the light is generally flat and tends to suck the life out of pictures. Experiment with backlighting subjects and get up early to catch the morning fog one morning - if you can capture that eeriness then you're better than me .

 

1. Quantity

A few years back I'd be saying use patience and concentrate on quality but with the advent of digital photography there is now no excuse not to take lots and lots of photos. Chances are there'll be one or two great shots amongst them. Just remember not to save them all otherwise you'll find your hard drive full of not-so-great snaps in no time.

Top 5 tips for budget travel planning

I've travelled a lot, so for once I can speak with a certain degree of authority - although every traveller is different. These are my tips for budget travel. As always, I am very keen to get your insight and will share the best user tips with everyone by adding them to the bottom of this page.

5. Don't book through travel agents

4. Wait until you get there to book activities

3. Don't plan too much

2. Travel light

1. Share

5. Don't book through travel agents

Good for booking package holidays, but not for the budget conscious. A cheaper alternative is to get your flights and accommodation separately. Any of the flight searching websites such as expedia would be a good place to get an idea of flight costs - although you would be wise to shop around as prices can vary drastically from site to site. Try to beware of sites that don't list all fees in their prices, as fuel surcharges and other taxes add considerably to the cost.

4. Wait until you get there to book activities

Although it is sometimes necessary to book popular things in advance it is nearly always better to wait to book activities until you get there. This, of course, depends on how long you have in each place and how long you'd have to wait to get on the tour you want. For example, I arrived in South Africa on one day and booked a budget Kruger park safari for the next day for at least $100 less than it would have cost to book over the internet. 

3. Don't plan too much

Organising every detail can mean you get to do a lot more, but it leaves you a lot less open to experiencing a trip. 

E.g. If you meet new friends who are going a different route or discover that you like a town so much that you want to stay longer. These are experiences that will make your trip more memorable, so try to stay open for them.

2. Travel light

It might take a few trips to get right but generally the less stuff you take the better. Less to carry, less to get stolen, less to pack and repack. A good, if not always feasible, idea if you're planning a long trip is to go on a short trip first. You will find that there's not much difference, if any, in the amount of things you need for a week versus a year.

1. Share

Go with a friend or travel with people (just make sure it's safe to do so). Any way you can share costs is a way to save money. Like sharing the cost of food shopping or splitting travel costs or camping fees. It is also much more fulfilling to share experiences with others even if you have only just met them.

Tips for giving speeches

It's not normal to be comfortable standing up in front of a group of strangers but it's become a necessary part of many people's lives.  This guide is to try and help people deal with giving speeches and is based on my own methods for speaking in public. If your experiences differ and you have advice to offer the world, then leave me a comment and I'll add it to a user's tips section at the bottom of the page.

 

 

5. Know your subject

4. Practice

3. Family or friends

2. Attitude

1. Enthusiasm

 

5. Know your subject

 If you've been asked to make a speech, you probably know all about the subject in question but it never hurts to make sure you know it inside out. If you're making a speech for school, pick a subject you know about, a hobby or favourite thing and then research it - the internet is a wonderful tool.

 

4. Practice

Once you've written it out, practice. Keep doing it until you feel you know it without the script. That way, when you come to perform in public, having the script will give you a little extra confidence.

 

3. Family or friends

Technically this is part of tip 4. but I wanted to emphasis the importance of practicing in front of people.

You're family or close friends are probably the best audience  for the nervous speech giver but it is often still difficult to feel completely at ease. Ask them to be patient and supportive and keep at it until you can do it with confidence.

 

2. Attitude

Try to approach the lectern with confidence and remember to pick a point at the back of the room, just above the audiences heads and talk to there. If you make a mistake make light of it and carry on.

 

1.Enthusiasm

 Put enthusiasm into what you're saying. Enthusiasm is infectious and most people are happy to listen to someone who is passionate about their subject. Try to make the audience see what is so great about what you're telling them.

 

 

Things you need when stuck up a hill

The full title of this top 5 tips article should read - things you need when stuck up a remote hill somewhere surrounded by fog for 2 days running... and no idea where you are - but I felt this wasn't pithy enough so I shortened it a little. AS you can probably tell, this article is based on my own experiences so may not be all that useful, but I hope to write a few articles that will apply to more generic camping situations at a later date. Anyway, here are the tips;

 

5. Entertainment

4. Don't look outside

3. Conserve energy

2. Take a GPS

1. String

5. Entertainment

The wind is howling and you have nothing to do until daybreak so you may as well catch up on a good book or listen to your favourite M.C Hammer song on mp3.

 

4. Don't look outside

Once you have erected your tent, get inside. Your bleak surroundings will only depress you.

 

3. Conserve energy

Try not to eat all the energy bars and beef jerky you brought along on the first day. These are excellent camping foods btw as they boost your energy, fill you up a little and you can fit loads in your bag.

 

2. Take a GPS

It's all well and good being able to read maps but if you can't see your hand in front of your face there's no way of knowing where you are. So consult your beautiful GPS (hardcore GPS only please - no mobile phone based systems) and pray that some country hasn't invaded and forced the defence department to shut down the satellites - or possibly worse, alter them to give false readings.

 

1. Essentials

Always carry  two metres of string. I didn't use it in my experience but it's always comforting to have when camping.

If you have any suggestions for tips for this subject then leave them in the comments section and the best 5 (in my opinion) will  get added to a Users tips section to appear here.

How to watch Spaced

For those of you unfamiliar with it, Spaced was a British sitcom which is perhaps one of the best shows ever to be broadcast on Earth.This is a guide on how to watch it.

Spaced was directed by Edgar Wright and starred Simon Pegg as Tim Bisley and Jessica Hynes as Daisy Steiner, two strangers posing as a couple to get an apartment. If it sounds like any other sitcom, then just watch it and apologise to me later. It's filmed in a cinematic style and full of film references and awesomeness. If you liked Shaun of the Dead or Hot Fuzz then you already like the people who made Spaced, so check it out... and when you do, use my tips to make it even better;


5. The drinking games
4. A Spaced night
3. Clubbing
2. With a British person
1. With a geek


5. The drinking games
There are many variations of this game but my favourite is 'drink-a-long-a-Marsha' as that gets you the most drunk! Simply take a drink every time Marsha does and away you go! You may also like to try drinking whenever a film is referenced, or whenever Mike's moustache appears on screen.


4. Clubbing
A1, tip-top, clubbing jam fair.... Or words to that effect. Watching episode 6 of series 1, entitled epiphanies, when about to go out with your friends is possibly the best way to get into that clubbing mood. Dressing a chubby friend up in tight fitting women's clothing is not advisable in real life, but always fun if you can manage it... and if you can work the A-team dance into your evenings entertainment you are a legend.


3. A Spaced night
Once you are familiar with the episodes you will know which characters you and your friends are (e.g. I am Tim because I once bleached my hair.. and I own a pencil) and can set about having a Spaced night. This simply involves dressing as your favourite character and watching a few episodes - interspersed with fun games like; fake gun fights, angry painting, gun assembly/disassembly and freeing dogs from laboratories (advanced Spaced nights only!). For some reason I have a lot of friends who are a lot like Mike, which scares me a bit, but when it comes to Spaced nights - the more Mikes, the better.


2. With a British person
Although the makers can justifiably claim an international appeal for the show I still feel that most people would benefit from having a British person who can help explain some of the more obscure references... or just to translate what Tyres says.Of course, beyond Spaced, it is also useful to have a British person around for other things... which is probably a Top 5 topic for the future... but I'm thinking for use as a butler or to screen your phone calls.


1. With a geek
There is a homage-o-meter on the DVD that helps point out the many varied references throughout the show, but to truly understand Spaced you will require the services of a geek. Only through their eyes will you comprehend the full majesty of the series - it's like watching fireworks through the eyes of a child.#

Unlike British people I have yet to find other reasons to have geeks around - but that's probably because I am one, and if there was another one here nothing would get done because we'd be arguing about Hawk the Slayer all the time... Hawk the Slayer is rubbish by the way, but in a 'so rubbish, it's brilliant' kind of a way (for an explanation of the 'so rubbish it's brilliant' phenomenon please see your local geek).

# please note: watching things through other's eyes is a metaphor and not to be taken literally.



If you have any ideas for tips for this subject then leave them in the comments section and the best 5 (in my opinion) will get added to a Users tips section right here.

Tips on packing bags for a trip

I have spent many a happy hour in an airport and have had occasion to pack my bags a great many times. I have used each of these tips at one time or another and so I present them for your viewing pleasure;


5. Roll, don't fold
4. Plastic fantastic
3. Valuables
2. Wear lots
1. Spare clothes


5. Roll, don't fold
If you're trying to cram in as much as possible, roll, don't fold. Rolling is a lot more space efficient than folding and actually decreases wrinkles so give it a go.


4. Plastic fantastic
Make sure you wrap up any shower gels etc. in plastic bags, to avoid leakage.


3. Valuables
Makes sure to keep as many of your valuables as possible in your carry on luggage. It is always advisable to keep anything you treasure as close to you as possible and away from errant baggage handlers or the lost luggage department of some far off airport.


2. Wear lots
It may be hot but, if you're stuck for space in your bag, wear whatever you can. In practical terms you only have to wear things whilst you are going through security anyway - the rest of the time you can carry them in a plastic bag. Works well if you have a big winter coat and sweaters or hoodies that just won't fit in your bag.


1. Spare clothes
Accidents do sometimes happen and luggage gets misplaced. That's why it's best to always carry underpants, a t-shirt and socks in your carry on luggage so you have fresh clothes to change into should anything go awry. This is also useful if on really long flights, at stopovers along the journey - for those of us who get stinky after sitting for so long and need to freshen up.


If you have any suggestions for tips for this subject then leave them in the comments section and the best 5 (in my opinion) will get added to a Users tips section right here.

How to relieve boredom

Let's face it, boredom is boring. A general lack of things to do is often the cause of it, and so I introduce to you my top tips for boredom avoidance. Any comments I receive that have awesomeness in tip form shall be added to the bottom of this article - so look out for them!

5. Exercise
4. Movies
3. Blogging
2. Randomail!
1. Wittypedia


5. Exercise
I don't normally put my lists into too specific an order but this is definitely at the lower end of the list for a reason! Exercise is good for you and gets you out of the apartment but, let's face it, is a last resort for the terminally bored. It is highly effective though as, when I'm doubled over in pain with stomach cramps i find it very hard to feel bored too.

4. Movies
Depending on how bored you are, this may work. I suggest renting something new or going to the cinema over watching familiar DVD's. Try to find something frothy and light or exciting as dramas tend to be depressing and may in fact highlight the boredom you are feeling.

3. Blogging
Blog like the wind! Although try not to blog about how bored you are as that'd be boring to read and may increase the number of bored people in the world (although the thought of so many other bored people may make you feel slightly better about yourself so go ahead). I chose to blog about my top 5 things to do when bored... but bored people may find this sort of thing too much hard work.

2. Randomail!
A game of my own invention. For the dirty minded amongst you it has nothing to do with being randy, sorry. It's all about being random.
The idea is simply to think of a nice name or strange combination of words that pleases you and then put them into the format of an email address. Then compose a lovely email about how you are writing to them to let them know how much you like their email address and offer your hand in friendship or just wish them a lovely day - you can even refer them to this blog so they can see why you did it. Then send it and see if it bounces. If you find an address that works you then have the thrill of seeing whether they reply (don't get your hopes up!)

1. Wittypedia
There are others out there, but by far the newest and least tainted of the funny encyclopaedia's is http://www.wittypedia.com/.
You can either read the terribly humorous articles (well, some articles are just terrible) to alleviate your boredom or, if you're feeling very bored or extremely witty you can write your own.
You just have to create a free login account to gain access to editing functions but then you can add pages as you like.
I personally like to pick a subject and come up with a slightly less than truthful but satirical article (as long as it makes me laugh I'm happy)... others like to write nonsense. It's fun!

How to stay cool in summer

It may seem out of season to some but I am currently in the southern hemisphere and going through non air conditioned 40 degree (Celsius) days. So my first real addition to this blog will be my tips for survival in these conditions. If you know of any different or more effective ways to stay cool then please leave a comment and I'll add it to the page in the Users Top Tips section below.

5. Ice blocks
4. Bottles
3. Fan
2. Hot drinks
1. Nudity

5. Ice blocks
I don't know what the correct name for these is. They're the flavoured sticks of liquid that you put in your freezer and they are the best invention in the world. I personally like to place them on strategic parts of my body which garners me temporary relief and also has the added bonus of melting them so I can drink the refreshing liquid.

4. Bottles.
In a move similar to ice blocks, I've taken to placing 1.5ltr bottles of water into the freezer. When frozen these tend to stay colder for a long time - although watch out for moisture build up on the outsides as they heat up.
Awesome for a spot of cool relief and relinquishing the icy water when melted. Watch out for brain freeze.

3. Fan
Took me ages to eventually buy a fan and although it tends to just push the warm air around it can, in conjunction with tip 1, produce satisfactory cooling.

2. Warm drinks
I dunno where I read this but it seems to work a little. Warm drinks heat up your body internally and fool it into thinking it's even hotter than it is. This in turn causes your body to try to cool down more which makes you cooler... Well, that's my story and I'm sticking to it! That and I just like a good cup of tea.

1. Nudity
Either partial or full, you can't get much cooler by natural means than getting in the buff. Combined with tip 3 it is an effective means of keeping cool, but don't get too close.



Users Top Tips

There are currently no tips in the user section. Leave your ideas in the comments section and help the world stay cool!

Top 5 reasons I made this blog

Welcome one and all!

This blog was created so I could share my ideas on a range of different subjects which are either gathered from internet research, personal experience or simply made up in an effort to make me (and hopefully you) laugh.

Each subject will be added in the same format as below and hopefully, eventually, will become a comprehensive guide on everything in the universe... but for now i will start with my 5 reasons for making this blog!

5. Boredom
4.Justification
3. Because I can't think of 10 tips
2. Feedback
1. To help... or entertain

5. Boredom.
A limited factor in my decision to blog was the amount of free time I find myself with right now. My plan is to do something constructive so I don't waste my days whittling twigs into smaller twigs.

4. Justification
Not to justify my existence or anything like that but simply to justify the amount of money I am spending on this mobile broadband internet connection!

3. Because I can't think of 10 tips
Having said that, I think I might tend to ramble a wee bit in these tip explanations sections. So it's possible you will get 10 tips for the price of 5 anyway!

2. Feedback
I don't pretend to hold the answers to everything but hopefully some of my suggestions are good. For the things I miss or ideas that are better, I'm hoping you guys will leave your ideas in the comments section. I will then compile them into a 'users top 5' underneath my own list in the hope that everyone will learn something new.

1. To help... or entertain
If some of my more serious tips can help people then that would be awesome, but if it merely entertains people for a brief moment, then I will be equally happy.